Day 302 Beijing Haze

One of the reasons we are so well taken care of here in Beijing
is because they have a difficult time securing good educators
who are willing to move to China, where the reputation of dirty
air is paramount to everyone's concern.  We have been blessed
with so many blue sky, clean air days throughout the winter and
spring, that we were settling in to 'the good life' of living as an ex pat.

Our days here are largely measured by the AQI (air quality index).
We all have this app on our phones, but all I have to do is look
out my bedroom window when I wake up in the morning.  If I
have my beautiful mountain view, it's going to be a great day!
We have had so many, many days in the 20's and 30's, one
would have thought we were living in Denver, not Beijing.

And then the air quality when straight to hell in a hand basket.
For a solid week now, the AQI has been anywhere from 200-358.

As I look out the window from the copy machine,
and I am 'greeted' by this view. I want to say bad words.

For a week now, I look out the office, and I can barely see
over a city block away.  The mountains are long gone.  And
so is my happy, spirited self.  I want to flip China the bird.
Couple this air with Len leaving, and I have engaged in bad
habits once again, namely mac n' cheese, and oreos and milk :/

Beijing recognizes the pollution is a problem, but rather than calling it pollution, smog, or sh***y air, they throw a spin and call it "haze".  Even the weather apps on our phone call it a "hazy" day.  Who are we kidding?!  The air has been putrid.  The only two things that seems to bring clean air is a beautiful breezy day, or a convention of world leaders (i.e., APEC) in which the factories were shut down over 100 miles from our capital city.  Yep, during the APEC convention last November, the AQI actually hit ZERO.  It is possible to have clean air in China, afterall.  This article appeared in the news a few weeks ago which I found interesting:  smog article

Not only has the air been lousy, but the temperatures have
soared into the 90's here.  In another unusual twist of fate,
it has also been more humid.  Typically it is ridiculously dry
in Beijing.  Heat, humidity, and lousy air just compounds the
lousy disposition....and then the rain came!  Praise Jesus!

This Friday I was treated to a spectacular
lightening show and thunderstorm.  I watched
the view from my reading nook for about 45
minutes until I could stand it no longer.  I prayed
that 45 minutes of rain got rid of the potential for
acid rain, and I went out and played in it until
my fingers went numb.  Thankfully, I woke up
to a full head of hair Saturday morning, but
the air remained lousy the rest of this weekend :(

In other news, the construction project at school has begun in
earnest.  They are blowing the entire south end of our building
and expanding.  It was announced that our temporary location
in the fall will be in the library, where they plan to create
46 classrooms for us all to share.  It is rumored that two teachers
will share a classroom, with our desks ('offices') in the room.

Optimistically they think we will be in our new building when
we return the end of February 2016, to begin the second semester.
Realistically, I am preparing myself for an entire year of upheaval.
Though this is one time I hope China adheres to its 'slap it together
quickly' standard of construction.  Things do move fast in China :)

It will be interesting to see what greets us when we return in
August.  For now, I am counting down the days until I am
home.  I have just eleven more sleeps until I fly out of
here and into the gorgeous clean air, blue skies of the USA :)

On that happier note, G'nite, y'all!

Day 300 signs...lost in translation

China is freakin' hilarious sometimes.  I swear I have smiled and laughed more in the last 10 months of my life than I remember in quite some time.  When you throw yourself headfirst in to a new country and a new culture that you can't begin to understand, you MUST have a sense of humor.  It is simply a matter of survival; surviving the China.  As is commonly the talk in the cafeteria, or on our various outings, we trade funny stories of the signs and tshirts that make no sense to us.  The Chinglish here is something else. I have laughed so hard I've cried....like back in the early days of finding one "slightly fried squeak" and "fried enema" on a Chinese menu.  Oh, China, you slay me.  

Well, some of us started a thread email and wechats where we'd post the latest photo that just didn't quite make the translation.  If anything, the China loves her signs.

Like this one at school "Don't stick your finger where it
doesn't belong" (in the elevator door).

There were some guests musicians performing at our school
early in the year.  This sign hung in the front foyer of the
school for weeks "All of us will pleasure you coming!!"
That Chinglish scored two exclamation points :)
I wonder if the concert was really that good?

"The green grass at the foot of the benefit."
Please keep off the grass. maybe?!

This was found online by one of my colleagues.
I like China's reverse psychology!

Len and I saw this one last week in Tianjin.
Sadly, I didn't get it at first...ice cubes in a
leaning glass?!  Ohhhhh....'don't drink and drive'.
Now what made this so funny was because it was
hanging the wrong way on a one way street. Oh, China.

And if you happen to drink too much, 'slip and fall
down carefully.'  The Chinese are the nicest people :)

  

ummmm, or maybe not.

A sign like that would stop me dead in my tracks.
Whew, that was a close call!

I never was a big fan of fresh crap- or any crap,
for that matter :/  Keep your crap to yourself, please.

Ok, no need to be nasty about it.

More politeness in an attempt to say 'keep off the grass!'

There are many signs about the placement
of your feet in China, but this one in Qingdao
made zero sense... "The flowers with one foot".
The statue had two feet, and she wasn't holding
a flower. I also could not find any monopodded
posies anywhere in the park.  Zero sense.

I understand how the whole concept of homonyms can be tricky
in the English language.  No trickier than saying the same two letter
 word in Mandarin, by using the four different tones, can produce four
completely unrelated words!  What I cannot understand is how this
banner appeared at the BNDS graduation last week... I mean, really?
We have over seventy international teachers on staff and it never
 occurred to somebody that someone, somewhere, should do some
proofreading first?! It makes you wonder if that Chinese tattoo you
got on your hip really is the Mandarin characters for "Peace, Love,
and Happiness"  How do you know it doesn't say, "Eat at Wongs"?

Maybe it's all a superlative conspiracy.
That's it; I'm sure of it.

  

That's the only plausible explanation for
this shirt we saw in Tianjin.  I think the
designer has decided to make fun of us
making fun of their Chinglish.  Kind of like
the 'American parties' thrown by the Chinese-
they play beer pong, wear plaid shirts, sling
Budweisers from red solo cups, and such...smh

Sometimes just one misplaced letter takes
on a whole new meaning.  This was the sign
in the waiting area of the utility company today.
I did my best to be very, very quite.

When Len and I stepped off the Tianjin Eye last weekend,
we were not in the mood for some French lemon treat.

Interestingly, the other side of the same kiosk had it right!
Still, we didn't know what a Lemon Exchange was...
unless they meant a lemon shake-up?  It's possible.

This was painted on the side of a cafe wall.
I didn't know Jesus turned the water into a keg o' beer!

While the placement of one letter can make all
the difference....(a woman in our complex wears
an "ACNE" shirt in bold letters across the chest)
sometimes there is an entire prose of misplaced words.
You tell me what it means....
"Out beyond idea of worry doing and right
doing there is a field I will meet you there."

I'm supposed to meet you where?!  

Could you just drop a pin for me, please?! :)

G'nite, y'all!

Day 293-294 Tianjin, China- what a gem :)

Len's last weekend here, we took a train trip to
Tianjin to explore another beautiful city in China.

It was a quick trip there; only 30 minutes on the
bullet train! Why have I not gone before now?

As the train slowed down approaching Tianjin,
I saw this beautiful pagoda outside my window.
I think I am going to like this place!

We stayed at the Holiday Inn Riverside, which I
highly recommend; it's right next to the Tianjin Eye :)
We dropped our back packs at the motel room,
and decided to go explore...

Squishy!

We decided to do the river walk, as far as our
legs could take us.  

The city has a large European influence, particularly German,
so the architecture along the river was beautiful.  We were
looking forward to some good German food :)

There were beautiful bridges along the way, each with it's own
unique character and design.  This one led to the German
and Italian concession (neighborhood).

True to china form, brides were out in full
force, having fake wedding pictures taken!
So weird.

The weekend marked the Dragonboat Festival.  If you are
interested in what all the fuss is about to warrant a three
day weekend, click here: Legend of the Dragonboat

Lots of folks were fishin'- a nice way to spend
an afternoon.  I discovered later that where the
river meets the bay is a large shipyard. It
turns out Royal Caribbean docks there, and
offers a seven day cruise to Korea and Japan-
I filed that one in my mind for next year!

We crossed the river toward the German concession.

It always makes me smile to see the cross in China :)

In this case, though, there was some sort of military park
on the courtyard in front of the church.  Tanks & religion? Hmm...

Definitely a military monument of some sort.

Also on the courtyard of the church was some sort
of carnival going on.  Ironic they were using 'toy'
machine guns to pop balloons!

Across the street from the church, military
monuments, and carnival games was this
statue....if China is anything, she is eclectic!

We walked through the German concession and scoured
all of the restaurants and pubs to decide what we wanted
 for dinner.  While there was German slaw, potatoes, bread
and such, the table next to us opted for the assortment
of German sausages and meats. That's a lot of cholesterol there!
Our meal was delicious- but I have never had bad German food. Ever. 

The evening walk along the river back to our hotel was
beautiful.  We hoped to ride the Eye and see the city lights
but it was closed by the time we got there.  The Holiday
Inn is the taller building you see- a great location!

Wanghailou Church, aka the Catholic Church in town.

Looks beautiful all lit up at night.

It was a perfect evening- not too hot-
so we stayed along the waterfront to
watch the boats and people watch :)

Selfie time! (he tolerates me :)

It was quite entertaining watching families send their paper
lanterns aloft.  Some did not fair so well; heading straight for
the trees, the traffic in the middle of the street, toward the
bridges, ferris wheel, and the rooftops.  Clearly there are no
regulations of any sort- yet they were a floating (often
sinking) firebomb. as a wind gust would catch them and
set the whole thing aflame!  It was pretty entertaining :)

This was the girl's second attempt,
but it also become a fire bomb the minute
they let go.  It blew straight into the trees.
They shook it out, and it ended up in the traffic.
I am surprised there was no KABOOM!

Before turning in, we topped the night off with a
little 'Marital Bliss', as Len calls this ice cream bar.
We see this ice cream on nearly every street
corner, and the couple on the package looks
like they had to partake in some ice cream
while on their honeymoon.  Of course, it was
likely a 'fake' honeymoon, because it was a
'fake' wedding, and the couple probably don't even
know each other, and really, the ice cream is
'fake', too, but it's the Chinese way, ya' know?
It makes us giggle ;)

The next morning, at breakfast, we discussed our plan for the day.
We wanted to hop on the Eye first, hopefully avoiding the
crowd before all the tourists hit the streets.  We also wanted
to check out Dabei Temple (which was right outside our bedroom
window) the 'ancient' cultural street, and the Italian Street if
we had time before catching our evening train back to Beijing.

A forty-five minute wait wasn't so bad- nothing like the
 madness here the night before!

Just two crazy kids riding the giant ferris wheel :)

Beautiful views of the city!

Any time I see water, I cannot help but smile :)

I zoomed in, and found a marble boat!  We need to go see it!!!

All too soon we were at the very top!

Look how high up we are- so cool.

You know what that means?! Selfie time!! (he humors me :)

After we got off the Eye, we decided to
head downstream to find the marble boat.
This husband and wife were gathering
their nets from the river.  They had just
finished, and he took over at the helm,
while she began to pick the fish out.
These are the moments I love the most in
my travels, just seeing people going
about their ordinary lives, in their little
corner of the world.  I love people <3.
(Well, most of the time, anyhow, lol)

Found it!  Only minutes before we had been
'up there' looking at the marble boat 'down there'.
Now we were ' there' at the marble boat looking
'up there' at the Tianjin Eye.  Life is funny like that.

The only other time I have seen a marble boat was at
the Summer Palace in Beijing.  I am fascinated by them :)

Somebody else seemed pretty interested, too.

How cool would it be to have a  marble ship's wheel in your home?
Ok, well, maybe it would just be super cool in MY home :)

The ornate carving on the boat was gorgeous.

Walking all along the river walk you would
come upon these beautiful scenes carved in to
the walls that seemed to tell the rich history of
Tianjin.  I, of course, had to find a sailing ship ;)

Swimming in the river seemed to be a favorite past time on a
hot summer's day.  I was amazed at all the bobbing heads in the
water, swimming across and back, right in the middle of tourist
boats, water taxis and other boats.   It looked dangerous to me!
Once when I remarked about how dangerous many things seem
to be here, and that not much caution is given to personal safety,
my students' response was, "We have so many Chinese, what is
one less person if somebody should get hit by a bus (or boat)?
I guess they have a point, maybe?! When there's 1.3 billion,
maybe there are a few to spare. Somehow, though, that
thought just seems wrong to me.

This couple cracked me up- at least momma
was plainly visible with her bright orange
safety ring (that looked like it had been
taken from one of the tourist boats, lol).
They were laughing at me laughing at them :)

Many were enjoying the water, naked babies
and all.  It's the Chinese way.

We moseyed on down to the 'ancient' Chinese
cultural center, which is code for "tourist
trap!"  There was the usual Chinese kitsch;
nothing I really wanted to buy, except for a
magnet for my refrigerator to add to the collection.
The guy below was an artist with spun sugar...

This cutie was a hot, sticky mess with
his cotton candy.  I was so happy the first
time I discovered that China has cotton candy!

Len and I cut through a shopping plaza on our way to lunch.
We passed an 'English school' (they are all over China) where
adults were getting schooled in speaking the English language,
and the language of LOVE. It must have been a two for one special.
The lesson was called "How to be Romantic" and the teacher was
giving this advice: *Before he or she finishes a sentence, kiss him
 or her passionately. *Draw a bath and throw in some rose petals.
*Say, "You'll never lose me" with a gift of a compass. *When he
or she is taking a shower, draw a heart on the mirror. *Kiss in
private, and in public. *HOLD HANDS *Play footsies while
watching TV or a movie.  *Buy a gift for no reason.
It was funny to watch the Chinese students listening to
their teacher.  Their expressions looked as if they were
hanging on to her every word!  

By the time we got back near our hotel to see Dabei Temple,
it had already closed, but we still took a walk around outside.

 

 

He looked like he had a ball in his mouth!

You know I have a 'thing' for doors :)

Since it was getting late in the day, we decided to head on down
to the train station for a little more people watching before we boarded.

This middle aged woman in curlers, had her
husband snap no less than a half dozen pictures
of her...because why?!  This was along the
waterfront, where everyone and his brother
was out for an evening stroll.  She was not
the least bit bothered by her appearance...
in fact, she seemed quite proud of herself, lol.
(How about those crazy colors she's wearing?!)

She made us giggle :)

I loved this clock sculpture that was in the center of a
roundabout.  So pretty against the setting sun.

As the sun went down, the city lights came on- beautiful :)

I tried to capture the cityscape in a panoramic shot.

Soon, we were back in the train station, waiting
to board the high speed train back to Beijing.
I see this all the time, and it still strikes me funny.
People squat in China.  All. the. damn. time.
There's going to come a day when I squat and
won't be able to get up...I can't help but think what
happens to the elderly Chinese with creaky bones?
As I pondered that thought, it was time to board.

G'nite, y'all!