If somebody would look at the pictures on my phone, they would think wth? You would find me petting a tiger in Thailand, jumping on beaches all over the world, diving with a whale shark in the Maldives, my cat on my sailboat, my children, waterfalls, food, some selfies, and lots and lots of pictures of home construction, renovation and repairs. It's an odd mixture, to say the least.
While it's a known fact that I love working with my hands, and using power tools to build something new or to make things "pretty", these construction and renovation photos are not just about Len and I's home in Florida.
There is a down side to living in China...
...what to do when something in your apartment breaks.
In the United States, you would simply call your landlord, and depending on how emergent the situation is, you could expect that the repair would be made sooner rather than later. Well, things are done very differently here in China, some of which is customary to a different culture, and some of which is complicated by the language barrier. Hence, the photographs...
You take a picture of what is broken, and then trudge off to the apartment management office. You show the photo to the lady behind the counter. She jibbers in Mandarin, you stare blankly and respond in English with "I don't know." "I don't speak Mandarin." You pull out your mad charades skills, and demonstrate that the item in the photo is "broken". She jibbers in Mandarin in response. You smile and look stupid in every sense of the word. You then count on your fingers in Mandarin (because that's about all you know how to do in Mandarin) to see if you can figure out a time when they might send a repairman to the stupid laowai who is flailing her arms and acting like she has a broken something on her body, not in her apartment.
Not certain that you've made a lick of sense, she only jibbers at you in Mandarin EVEN LOUDER- like that helps matters any. You then think to pull out one of your utility cards which shows your apartment building number, which tower, and your particular apartment number. For example, I live at 24-04-902. You point at the clock on your phone, in a second attempt to nail down what time a repairman may turn up. In exasperation, she then very plainly says in English, "Go Home!" and points to the door.
Now, that, I understand.
So I go home...
...where I could wait 10 minutes, 10 hours, or even 10 days.
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| On Sunday I had to replace another outlet that crapped out- this is the third one (Made in China, you get what you pay for). Behind my apartment complex in an alley market that I call "Home Depot". It's one stall after another of home repair supplies. You pull out your phone, show the photo of what you need and shop vendors all start pointing you in the direction of the stall that sells electrical supplies. The Chinese are helpful in that regard :) |
The good news is it cost me 12 rmb for a new outlet, 10 rmb to pay the repairman, and two trips to the management office to get the job done. While it was a hassle and two hours out of my Sunday afternoon, the total repair came to a whopping $3.42- that's parts and labor.
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| The bad news is my faucet has been 'breaking' for days now- it won't shut completely off. I just have not had the time to deal with it. I woke up to a flooded bathroom this morning, so I guess today was the day I have deal with it. I took a photo. |
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| I turned off the water at the feed lines and took another photo, just in case those need replaced, too. |
And I'm thinking, "Oh God, here we go again with this woman."
It's fair.
I "Go Home!" as I have been ordered to do once again, and I wait. This time, in pretty short order, a plumber shows up to my apartment, takes one look at my faucet and starts gibbering at me in Mandarin. Fortunately I was in my apartment where the internet works great, the VPN was connected, and I could use Google translate on my laptop to somewhat reasonably communicate with him. As I suspected, I needed a new faucet. We quickly got that sorted out, and I told him I would pedal to the alley market, pick up a faucet and be right back. He wouldn't hang around to smoke a cigarette like I had wanted. Instead, it meant another trip back to the management office once I had the faucet in hand, to put in the formal work request for the plumber to return to change it out.
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| Is there anything in this packaging that says "bathroom faucet" to you??? |
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| Yeah, me neither. China can be so confusing. At least I was pretty confident I had what I needed as I've bought plumbing fixtures a time or two in my lifetime. I even bargained down to 300rmb, less than $45 bucks for a solid stainless steel faucet with brass fittings- no plastic parts on this one, a bargain! |
She tolerates me.
Then points to the door.
I smile, place my hands in 'prayer mode' (which communicates 'thank you' in this part of the world)
and offer a xie xie (which sounds a little like 'she-she') and means thank you.
I didn't get a smile in return... I'm working on her... it's going to happen one of these days :)
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| I heard an hour's worth of grunting, ha-rumphing, lip smacking, tisking, and not an ounce of progress was being made. He had an adjustable wrench- that was the extent of his plumber's tools. He couldn't reach the nuts at the right angle, and couldn't see what he was doing. I gave him my headlamp, and then showed him a picture of a socket wrench set on my laptop- that would have done the trick. He waved me off, meaning he didn't own such a tool, and he continued to grunt and groan... |
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| I simply had to walk away. In the next hour, I peek in on him...progress was finally being made although he removed the entire vanity from the wall where he could get at the old faucet nuts with his trusty adjustable wrench. |
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| By 8;45pm, two and a half hours of labor thus far, and I was left with this mess for the night. He broke the feed lines and the drain taking the old ones off. To his credit, it really was not his fault. The water here is so hard and corrosive here, s**t just breaks. Unfortunately, plumbers and electricians in China do not carry supplies with them to the job site. If something breaks in the midst of a repair, they point for you to take a photos of the broken parts, and then the customer (me) is responsible for going on the scavenger hunt for the replacements. Remember there is no local Lowe's big box store here, and these transactions occur in a language I do not speak. Also unfortunately, since it was now going on 9pm, no alley market stalls were still open. Fortunately, he felt bad about breaking the parts so he said he would go and buy them first thing in the morning, and then come back to finish the job. Also fortunately, I did not have classes the first two periods the next day so hopefully this mess would all get put together before I had to teach class. I managed all of this communication by calling one of my students, Michael, to translate for me. Google translate wasn't cutting it. Michael is a kind and sensitive boy, and he likes coming to my China rescue. Thankfully he answered his phone in my time of need! |
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| This was the scene the next morning. Squatting isn't just for using the potty here in China- it's how the Chinese wait for the bus, smoke a cigarette, talk on the phone, have a rest, or simply do their work- all from the squatting position. It hurts my knees just to watch! |
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| It was another two hours replacing the broken parts, hooking it all back together, checking for leaks, and reattaching it all against the wall. My only complaint? He used clear caulk :-( |
People, that's a whopping $7.78!!!
It's the Chinese way.
G'nite, y'all!
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